It’s Not Easy Getting Older…

Miss Violet turned four on Monday.

Here is a birthday story worth writing down-

She woke up early on the morning of her birthday and asked me if today was the day she turned four. I told her yes it was.
Violet had preschool that day and proudly announced to her teacher and class that she was four today.
Fast forward a few hours and we are on our way home. I look in the rearview mirror and see she is about to cry. She starts to cry and I ask her what’s the matter?
She says, “I just want to be three again!”
I reply that she can pretend and she says “it’s not the same. I don’t want to be old, I want to be new.”
I convinced her that four was a good age because now she got four books at bedtime vs. three.
Man oh man, what is she going to think when she turns thirty?

 

Spring Resolutions

I’ve been spending a lot of time farting around.

Time to get down to the nitty gritty.

I resolve to:

write more

have sex much much more

kiss my kids a million times a day

read more

surf less

stop obsessing on the Havanese web forum

say no more

go see at least one local theater production

sing everyday

spend less

pray

try and make “to do lists”

try and get there “on time”

go on one trip somewhere new with my family

go camping

floss

give myself a break

don’t take everything personally

figure out how to use money vs. need money

love life

spend more time with nature

spend more time in the city

be uncomfortable

be comforted

write real letters to my friends

Hell, the list goes on.  To Spring and the new growth it brings. Sat Nam.

 

Grammar, Year of the Rat, and Otto

So my little brother called me last night and told me my grammar was not so good on this blog.Since, I’m basically using this as an outlet for some of my madness, I’m not surprised.  Thank God for spell check and red underlining. “Thank you God…”However, I went through my last few posts, and I have to say it wasn’t as bad as the fly boy made it seem.  Ahem…Again, I have shirked my blogging responsibilities and have tried my best at tending to my job, children, dog, my mom’s dog which we are currently caring for, my husband, and the ever mounting laundry.  Also, I’m finishing Jon Katz’s book, A Good Dog, and I barely get time for that.  Now may you all imagine me on the loo, book in hand, tears streaming down my face.  The crazy thing about the internet is I might have just turned some weirdo on right now by talking about me sitting on the crapper.Scary.In February the Chinese New Year will begin.  2008 is the year of the rat.  Doesn’t sound too good, I know….I got this from good old Wikapedia.

Being the first sign of the Chinese zodiacs, rats are leaders, pioneers and conquerors. They are charming, passionate, charismatic, practical and hardworking. Rat people are endowed with great leadership skills and are the most highly organized, meticulous, and systematic of the twelve signs. Intelligent and cunning at the same time, rats are highly ambitious and strong-willed people who are keen and unapologetic promoters of their own agendas, which often include money and power. They are energetic and versatile and can usually find their way around obstacles, and adapt to various environments easily. A rat’s natural charm and sharp demeanor make it an appealing friend for almost anyone, but rats are usually highly exclusive and selective when choosing friends and so often have only a few very close friends whom they trust.Behind the smiles and charm, rats can be terribly obstinate and controlling, insisting on having things their way no matter what the cost. These people tend to have immense control of their emotions, which they may use as a tool to manipulate and exploit others, both emotionally and mentally. Rats are masters of mind games and can be very dangerous, calculative and downright cruel if the need arises. Quick-tempered and aggressive, they will not think twice about exacting revenge on those that hurt them in any way. Rats need to learn to relax sometimes, as they can be quite obsessed with detail, intolerant and strict, demanding order, obedience, and perfection.Rats consider others before themselves, at least sometimes, and to avoid forcing their ideas onto others. Rats are fair in their dealings and expect the same from others in return, and can be deeply affronted if they feel they have been deceived or that their trust has been abused. Sometimes they set their targets too high, whether in relation to their friends or in their career. But as the years pass, they will become more idealistic and tolerant. If they can develop their sense of self and realize it leaves room for others in their life as well, Rats can find true happiness.According to tradition, Rats often carry heavy karma and at some point in life may face an identity crisis or some kind of feeling of guilt. Rats are said to often have to work very long and hard for everything they may earn or have in life. However, a Rat born during the day is said to have things a bit easier than those who are born at night. Traditionally, Rats born during the night may face extreme hardships and suffering throughout life. Rats in general should guard themselves against hedonism, as it may lead to self-destruction. Gambling, alcohol and drugs tend to be great temptations to Rat natives.Traditionally, Rats should avoid Horses, but they can usually find their best friends and love interests in Monkeys, Dragons, and Oxen.Professions include espionage, psychiatry, psychology, writing, politics, law, engineering, accounting, detective work, acting, and pathology.

Espionage?  Cool.Well, we’re in a new year anyway, and a lot has happened in the last twelve plus months.Our family lost two members of the canine variety, our beloved border collie Beauty and her partner in crime great dane Otto.  We put Otto down two weeks ago, and at the time I just couldn’t write about it.  I wanted to write something poetic about how I would capture his footprints in the snow after he had gone.  I remembered taking plaster of Paris and putting it deer prints, raccoon prints, with my dad as a child to make something fragile permanent.  I wanted to at least take a picture of those prints.It snowed the next day, covering the past, reminding us how fragile our existence is.  Like footprints in the snow or sand, washed away by the surf or snow.We’ve lost two dear friends and have found two new.  My mom adopted a mutant Shetland sheepdog in June (I say mutant because she’s nearly thirty pounds and looks like a shrunken collie) and we became the proud Mama and the Papa of our lovely Cuban girl, Posh.  She has delighted us in ways we never knew before.  Imagine big dog people becoming toy dog people.  For all you anti-”shit kicking dog” people out there, you don’t know what you’re missing.Well, this entry is up to nine hundred and seventeen, now nineteen now twenty one two three four six words, okay nine hundred and thirty three.I quit.

 

(Spay or Neuter)That Darn Cat!

Time to RANT!!!! Why do “country folk” find it purrfectly okay to have twenty cats running around their farm, breeding, getting hit on the highway, finding their way to my house where my kids fall in love with them, my dog tries to attack them and Adam finds himself playing vet to fix them?!

My “neighbors” across the county road have a cat problem that all started with two cats that they like, or so my neighbor lady says. Hello? Spay or neuter those darn cats. If you’re a “real country boy” like my cousin Rachel’s Uncle Auggie, you’ll neuter the cats yourself. Yes, you start out with one or two but they like to have babies and pretty soon you have a dozen.  Once upon returning a kitten to my neighbor’s house, Adam and Sage counted TWELVE cats!

So, last night, the kids are playing outside and Sage comes in really upset. He’s just witnessed our great dane, Otto, toss a ten week old kitten up into the air.  Adam goes outside to investigate and comes back with this little orange tabby kitty, eyes still blue, who has a torn open leg. The vet’s clinic is closed, I call my neighbor’s house (from whence I think the kitten came) and leave a message that we think we have one of their cats and it’s really hurting.  Dr. Adam treats the wound with antiseptic, and super glues the skin together because it’s a gaping hole. We’re talking muscle exposed-disgusting! Yeah, we should have probably taken the cat to the emergency vet hospital or something. But this wasn’t the first time it’s become “our problem” and we don’t have any, or plan on having any cats!  (And this is not because we don’t care about them, it’s because we do.)

This summer I saved a kitten from the middle of the busy county road separating us from them, “our neighbors.” This little boy, also an orange tabby, I kept in my garage to keep him safe from my dane, and the children quickly fell in love with him. Meanwhile, I don’t believe in having outside domesticated animals and our inside dog would kill this thing. So I tried to find a good home for him, knowing he was probably from the house across the road. Well, guess what folks, we called them and “yes” it was their cat!

Also, a couple of summers ago two little orange kitties wandered into our yard and even swam across our little decorative pond and up a tree to get away from the dane, Otto. I found two lovely inside city homes for but it wasn’t easy, and this is a HUGE problem in this area. People just consider them to be disposable forms of mice/squirrel control.

For instance, this is what my neighbor said to me this morning. I really tried my damnedest not to go off on her. “Well, I don’t see any hurting kittens around here, but maybe it’s hiding.”

Well, do you have young kittens at your house?

“We have one cat. The other are strays.”

You have one cat?

“Well, we have two that we like. They are really good for getting rid of mice and squirrels. I think I need to take a trip to the Humane Society and haul some in.”

You know, it’s pretty cheap to fix your cat and than you can keep the ones you like for mice control and you won’t have baby after baby after baby kitty spiraling out of control.

“Yeah. Okay.”

Duh! Come on people. Also, I don’t think “strays” come up to you wanting to be held and played with by small children. These cats have been completely socialized and domesticated.

Poor things. Okay, I’m stepping off my soap box. God bless feral cats, they’ll be here when we’ve gone from this world.

 

Yes, She Did it Again

Did anyone watch the MTV music awards?

I did not.  However, I caught this online today and just know either MAD t.v. or SNL will be spoofing this performance this weekend.

Wow!  It’s a really lame performance, but I rather like that she actually looks like she’s had two children…unlike, so many other mega-stars with kids.  So, the media says she is “out of shape,” well, her bod looks better than mine does after two bumpkins.  I think she might have considered a different outfit…and the stripping theme?  Total class.  Oops! She did it again.

 

Contents of Noses

Today I saw a woman picking her nose in public, as in the public library. I mean she was out and out digging for something special, on a shared public library computer where I have typed and picked up, boogers I guess, on my fingers.

Yuck!

I know, it’s allergy season, I’m suffering from Ragweed pollen terribly myself, but you still won’t find me wiping my snot on anything shared. Okay, that’s a lie, let’s just say you might not want to drive my car if you have to adjust the seat to get closer or farther away from the wheel. I pick my nose in the car, especially in congestion. My bets are placed that you do too.

I have often thought that driving in heavy traffic is similar to walking down the street in an urban busy landscape. Crowds of strangers encased in their own private environment, but essentially walking down a sidewalk. Every now and than I even make eye contact with another driver, and then feel strangely about doing so. We pick our noses in our automobiles, which have windows, going roughly the same speed as the neighboring vehicles. See my point? Would I pick my nose walking down the street in Minneapolis on a lovely night going out in the town looking my finest with heels, bag, and sexy threads donned.

No.

In the spirit of noses and allergies I will now interrupt this blog with yet another library observation. There is a man sneezing behind me and with each sneeze he does not “achoo.” Oh no, he sneezes and then says “shit.”

I think I might start sneezing “A a a -fuck yooo.”

Now, here is our “delightful” president serving yet again as a role model for public pickers everywhere.

 

Serendipity

I’ll start this post with a Rant, because sometimes the “dirt” really gets under our fingernails.

A few weeks ago, Adam and I worked a wedding gig in Chaska. It was a really great day-the people were amazing. However, it was a really hot day and we had spent it in the sun (outside ceremony) working our little tootsies off. After working a twelve hour day, I could only think about sitting back and relaxing somewhere nice.

I suggested to Adam that we venture off the beaten track to discover Excelsior, MN. I have recently found myself working with some members of my community to focus a downtown revitalization group, and Excelsior just so happens to be a role model of sorts.

We found the main artery of the beautiful and quaint downtown, parked our car, and began a leisurely stroll down the sidewalk looking for somewhere “nice.” Maybe a block into our little treasure hunt we came upon a very nice store front with elegant people sitting in cafe chairs sipping wines and looking like they were having a marvelously lovely summer evening. The cafe in question? Biella.

Doesn’t it look just lovely?

We thought it did too. So we went in. Immediately, we were “attacked” by the hostess/server. Like that opening scene in Jaws she came and pulled us under the water with an abrupt tug “Two for dinner?”

It was more like an accusation versus a question.

I’m going to back up and let you know, that although I’m not technically an “expert service critic,” I am somewhat validated by the fact that I owned and operated a coffee house for four years, and before that worked in food service for 8 years.

“Well, we’re really just interested in a couple of drinks,” Adam says honestly to our shark-ess. I cringe, knowing that this has sealed our doom. She’s thinking-I’m not going to let these people spend a measly 30 dollars! Oh no.

She placates us somewhat politely now with, “The bar might be opening up soon as I seat guests, and you can sit there.”

“Okay,”Adam says cheerfully.

About 1 minute passes.

“You know, I’m sorry, we can’t serve you.”

Whoa!

Again let me paint the picture more clearly. Adam and I have been working a wedding. Therefore, we are dressed professionally and quite nicely, all in black of course, but looking smart. We’re not talking a simple case of “No Shoes, No Shirt, No Service.”

She was totally rude. And, what made the experience even worse, was the fact that she wasn’t a “kid” working some job they didn’t care about for the summer. Rant Number One-Biella Restaurant.

So we left. We got into our car and we drove away. Almost out of the “main drag” were we, when a small neon sign caught my eye.

“Stop!” I declared.

318 Music Cafe. I had heard from an acquaintance that a this guy I had once met had started up a cool wine/beer/coffeehouse. It was serendipity. Meant to be, that whole nasty business earlier. 318 was exactly the type of place we were looking for (Rave Number 12). Small and cozy with good beer and good treats, the best treat being the intimate concert we were given by the blues/folk/singer/guitar player, Jason Shannon (Rave Number 13). Adam and I thoroughly enjoyed our Summit Scandia (Rave Number 14) whilst clapping along to Shannon’s catchy tunes. I think his mom and sister were in the audience, at least it seemed to be family…Also, some hip ladies in their 70’s that made me pleasantly optimistic about my own aging, my own hip lady future. My only complaint? The tables and chairs look like they were scored and salvaged from an out of business Denny’s Restaurant chain. They were so uncool. These not even uncooly cool tables were lined up and crammed together so that the servers’ butts were constantly in some patron’s face. I don’t know. Good if you’re into that kind of thing. I personally, don’t want any ass with my Summit.

 

Hello world!

I am going to try and attempt some sort of good things/bad things in the world blog.  Wish me luck!